


Down By The Old Saw Mill

by HazelWitch81



Category: Futurama
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-22
Updated: 2014-09-22
Packaged: 2018-02-18 09:41:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2343884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HazelWitch81/pseuds/HazelWitch81
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Farnsworth sends the crew to a planet called Old Saw Mill to make a documentary of a serial killer who lives there. Bender has mixed feelings about either joining the killer or helping to gang to take him down. Edgar and Chester from Jerkey Beef show up again. Who will fail and who will prevail? The PE Crew will have a Blair Witch expirence in this adventure!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Down By The Old Saw Mill

Edgar and Chester from Jerkey Beef are in this one. This is my last one I'm posting.

 

Futurama

 

None Of The Same Old Same Old

 

Screen: Ant And The Aarvark Cartoon

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter One:

 

At the Planet Express living room, Fry and Bender were watching Maury Povich's head.

 

Fry: Is this one of those 'Who's The Baby's Daddy' shows?

 

Bender: No, I think this is tracking down estranged relatives.

 

Fry: Maury used to do Baby Daddy shows back in my time.

 

On The TV, Maury Povich's head was talking to a mother looking for her daughter.

 

Maury: We're here today because Belinda is looking for her daughter who ran away with a gang and became a drug addict and a stripper....

 

Bender: WOW! I'd be honored to be _that_ kid's parent!

 

Maury: We just want to say that we found her.

 

Belinda: Thank you. I want to patch things up with her. (sobs) We never got along, all we did was fight and...

 

Maury (points to viewcreen on his show): And here she is. Cassidy...

 

Then Belinda's daughter Cassidy appears on the screen.

 

Cassidy: Hi, Mom. Just want you to know that I'm alive and well, and now I'm.........

 

Bender (turns off TV): Dead and rotting in a ditch!

 

Leela (walks into living room): Good for you, Bender.

 

Bender: What the hell do you mean by that?

 

Leela: You know when to turn off the TV when we have a mission to go on.

 

Bender: Dammit!

 

Fry: I never knew when to turn off the TV.

 

Leela leads Fry and Bender into the conference room. Hermes, Amy, and Zoidberg were there. They see Scruffy installing a camera.

 

Fry: What up, Scruffy? Are we delivering cameras today?

 

Scruffy: Nope, some very different.

 

Bender: Something Completely Different?

 

Scruffy: Ask the Professor.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Two:

 

Prof. Farnsworth comes in with news about the mission they are going to endure.

 

Farnsworth: Good news, nobody!

 

Hermes: We are going on this mission, too?

 

Farnsworth: Everyone is.

 

Amy: What's the mission?

 

Farnsworth: Today, we are not going to delivery anything.

 

Zoidberg: No deliveries? NNNNOOOOO!!!! (faints)

 

Farnsworth: Instead we are going to shoot a documentary.

 

Leela: What's the documentary about?

 

Bender: It should be about me, Bender! Future dictator and murderer of all humans!

 

Farnsworth: It's not about you, it's about a serial killer!

 

Hermes: Sweet Metrobus of Cyprus! Are you MAD professor?

 

Amy: Lots of people done documentaries on serial killers and were always killed.

 

Farnsworth: This isn't no orindary serial killer. He's from the Andronema Galaxy on a planet called Old Saw Mill.

 

Zoidberg (gets up): A documentary about a serial killer?! NNNNOOO!!!! (faints and gets up again) Who are we doing this about?

 

Farnsworth: His name is Old Man Spacey. He is the nightmare of all children....

 

Fry: Is he one of those Freddy Kruger types?

 

Farnsworth: Who's telling the story here, dope? Well, anyway, he is a scary stranger that kills, and he lives in an old shack in the woods.

 

Bender: Is he looking for a partner? Is he is, then I am in!

 

Farnsworth: Scruffy will go with you guys because he knows how to use camera equipment. I only trust him.

 

Leela: Come on guys. I know where the Andronema Galaxy is. We used to take field trips there when we were in the Orphanairum.

 

Bender: This is going to be coolest mission ever! I'm going to follow Old Man Spacey's example.

 

Fry (scared): I just hope we make it back alive!

 

Bender (slaps Fry): No wimping out on me, skinny! If Old Man Spacey sees I'm hanging around with a cowardly wimp, he'll want nothing to do with me!

 

Fry: I have sympathy for Shaggy.

 

They all go on the Planet Express ship and head for the Androema Galaxy and then onto the Planet Old Saw Mill.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Three:

 

The Planet Express ship is going to it's destination. It's going into the Androema Galaxy into a wormhole. And it's the Panama Wormhole they went int through before.

 

Leela: Remember this anyone?

 

Fry: Sure do. This time we're not being chased by Zapp!

 

Bender: Will you listen to you conscience ridden wussies? It was fun getting chased by the authorities!

 

Hermes: Wasn't fun almost getting killed...

 

Amy: All that was left of us were skeletons......(cyncially) Splah, that was fun!

 

Zoidberg: At least we got resurrected thanks for the Professor's Rebirth Machine!

 

Leela: OKay, no more words from you!

 

The Planet Express ship goes into the Panama Wormhole and comes out the other end and the GPS system tells that the Planet Old Saw Mill is miles away.

 

Scruffy: Got the camera ready. Let's shoot this mother!

 

Eventually they land in Old Saw Mill. The planet was just a huge forest and a wooden cabin. Old Man Spacey sees everything and lays in wait.

 

Old Man Spacey: Hmmm, wonder what victims will be coming my way?

 

Mom: Stop looking out the window! We're supposed to be on a date!

 

Old Man Spacey: Coming love buns! (whispers) Dates been over for a while, leave already!

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Four:

 

Everyone came out of the Planet Express Ship once it landed. Scruffy had a camera on everyone.

 

Scruffy: Hello, Scruffy Scruffington here. And we're from Planet Express. We're doing a documentary about a serial killer who appears in children's dreams named Old Man Spacey. This is called "The Saw Mill Project". These are my friends.

 

Fry: I'm Phillip Fry.

 

Leela: I'm Turanga Leela.

 

Hermes: I'm Hermes Conrad.

 

Amy: I'm Amy Wong.

 

Zoidberg: I'm Dr. John Zoidbe....

 

As Zoidberg was about to finish, Bender cuts in.

 

Bender: And I'm Bender Bending Rodriguez! These stories are just ahead tonight on 60 Murder!

 

Scruffy: Dammit Bender! Always hogging the spotlight.. All right. Enough introductions. Let's try to find a place where we can set up camp.

 

Zoidberg: Smell that fresh air.....(breaths and coughs)

 

Everyone followed Scruffy who had the camera, and they were having a hard time trying to find Old Man Spacey's cabin. They all decide to take a break and set up camp.

 

Leela: As usual, we're getting nowhere fast.

 

Bender (cutting in on Leela): And now a few Murders with Andy Rooney's head!

 

Leela: Stop Bender! We're trying to film a documentary!

 

Bender: Fine!

 

Zoidberg: Can I build a campfire?

 

Hermes: Sure you can! You can BE the campfire!

 

Zoidberg: Ohhhhhh.

 

Fry: My parents watched 60 Minutes.

 

Amy: How are we going to set up camp?

 

Leela (takes a pill and puts it in water): No problem.

 

The pill in the water turned into 5 tents.

 

Fry: Those are the same tents we used in the Army.

 

Hermes: Surprised you even survived that.

 

Darkness grows in the sky as they were all headed for bed. The tents had beds in them. Leela was wearing a light blue gown, Amy was wearing a hot pink nightshirt, Zoidberg was wearing one piece button pajamas, Scruffy was in his underwear, and Hermes was wearing shorty pajamas with the Jamaican Flag on them, and Fry was wearing white pajamas with red, green, blue, and yellow polka dots on them. Bender had on underwear. They all decided to start fresh in the morning.

 

Bender (in Southern Accent) What if he ain't dead by mornin'?

 

Leela: Bender, cut the comedy and go to sleep!

 

Bender: Last time I do Richard Harris impressions!

 

Fry: This is creepy enough as it is. Not in the mood to laugh.

 

Hermes: Good night, everyone.

 

As everyone went to sleep, the camera was still rolling. Zoidberg got out of his bed and took off his pajamas and there was his doctor's clothes.

 

Zoidberg: I've been pushed around for the last time. Once I get through with these people, for once, Zoidberg will be the hero!

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Five:

 

Everyone else was still sleeping and didn't notice Zoidberg was gone. Zoidberg goes into the woods and tries to find Old Man Spacey's Cabin himself. Back in the tents, a cloaked figure grabbed Scruffy in his sleep.

 

Zoidberg: I'll show 'em! I'll get Old Spacey First!

 

He walks along the forest for a while longer and is lost.

 

Zoidberg (nervously): Ooooooh, I'm lost, what'll I do? I need someone to guide me....

 

Then Zoidberg unwittingly bumps into a keg full of TNT. Zoidberg doesn't know he's headed to Old Man Spacey's Cabin.

 

Zoidberg: AH HA! (carries the keg) I see the cabin up ahead! Hooray! Zoidberg got to it first! Who needs stupid Fry, Leela, Bender, Hermes, and Amy anyway! Not me!

 

After a while, Zoidberg gleefully pours the keg of TNT and walks backwards towards Old Man Spacey's Cabin.

 

Zoidberg (sing song voice): Kill that guy with TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT! TNT!

 

Just as Zoidberg was pouring the keg, he bumped into someone. He turns around and it's Old Man Spacey!

 

Old Man Spacey: Intruder! What is your business here?

 

Zoidberg: I've come to.....take you down! (puts up his claws)

 

Old Man Spacey: Come on! Be a Man! Put 'em Up! (puts up his fists)

 

Zoidberg and Old Man Spacey both get into a scuffle. Then Zoidberg subdues him by hitting him in the eye. Old Man Spacey falls over and runs away, and comes back with a bazooka.

 

Old Man Spacey (aims bazooka and shoots at Zoidberg): YOU SHALL PAY FOR THIS!!!!

 

Zoidberg: YIKES!!!!!!

 

Old Man Spacey chased Zoidberg out of the cabin. Zoidberg managed to get away but gets hit in the behind by a missile.

 

Zoidberg: YEEEE-OOOWWWWWW!!!!!

 

Failed as usual, Zoidberg heads back to the tents.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Six:

 

Back at the tents, Fry wakes up to go the bathroom. Once he's done, he sees a package.

 

Fry: Wonder what this could be?

 

As Fry was opening the package, Bender wakes up.

 

Bender: Geez, Fry! What do you think this is, XMAS? How come you get to have cool gifts, and I don't?

 

Fry: I don't think this is a cool gift.

 

Bender (takes box away from Fry): Lemme see it! Finders Keepers!

 

Inside the box was a human heart. Fry notices Scruffy's gone.

 

Fry: Dude! Scruffy's gone! What happened to him?

 

Bender: Oh Your God! This is the awesomest gift in the world! A human heart!

 

Fry: Oh, no! I feared this. Old Man Spacey must've got Scruffy and brought us back his heart!

 

Bender: If that's the case....

 

Fry: I must go find Scruffy!

 

Bender: Fry, you idiot! You don't know you're way around these woods.....Leela's going to......Oh, hell! Go ahead! Get lost! See if I care! (holds heart) Alls I care about is this human heart! Maybe this is a sign! Maybe Old Man Spacey wants to recruit me after all!

 

Bender continues to admire the Human Heart, Fry runs into the woods in his pajamas.

 

Fry: SCRUFFY! SCRUFFY! SCRUFFY!!! SCRUFFY!!!!

 

With no luck, Fry continues to run into the woods. Bender tracked him down and brought him back.

 

Bender (hits Fry): Don't you ever do that again! Don't ruin my one chance to be a serial killer's apprentice! Do you hear me!

 

Fry: Yes Bender!

 

Bender: Now back to sleep.

 

Fry and Bender both go back to sleep. Bender was in charge of the camera now that Scruffy was gone.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Seven:

 

It was morning on the Planet Old Saw Mill. Everyone got out of their beds and got dressed. As soon as they were done, they heard a scream that sounded like a siren, and sure enough, it was Dr. Zoidberg!

 

Zoidberg: AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

 

Hermes: Is that an air raid siren? (gasps) It's the police! They know I've been hoarding weed! Oh, wait! That's Zoidberg!

 

Bender: Zoidberg sounds like Jonah Hill when he screams.

 

Leela: So true.

 

Amy: Zoidberg, what happened?

 

Zoidberg (gasping): I found Old Man Spacey!

 

Fry: You did? Have you seen Scruffy? He's missing. Alls that's left of him is this heart! (holds box with the heart in it)

 

Leela: You're right, Fry. Scruffy is gone.

 

Amy: Sploh No! Wish we had never gone on this mission! Scruffy's dead.

 

Bender: Yep, indeed he is! This heart is his remains! This can only mean that Scruffy is sleeping with the fishes!

 

Fry: Where is Old Man Spacey's cabin?

 

Leela: You said you found it, show it to us!

 

Zoidberg: As Toucan Sam once said, Follow My Nose!

 

Bender: That sounds so lame coming from him!

 

Leela: Guess it's come down to this! We're going to have to take down Old Man Spacey! He's got one of our own, and we must seek justice!

 

Fry: What are you getting at, Leela?

 

Leela: Looks like we're going to have to do the Zero Dark Thrity method! And no comparing me to Jessica Chastain! Zoidberg! Show us where that cabin is!

 

They all followed Zoidberg to the cabin. Bender was filming as Zoidberg lead everyone to the cabin.

 

Bender: Next up on National Bender-Graphic, Zoidbutt is all leading us to a death trap! Or is that Dead End? Does he have what it takes to fail? Will everyone die, and I survive and become Old Man Spacey's partner in crime? Stay tuned for the shocking conclusion!

 

Leela: Stop making this documentary about you, it's called The Saw Mill Project! Stick to the title!

 

Bender: Don't care! I'm calling it National Bender-Graphic! Or better yet, how about, Bender's Believe it Or Not?

 

Zoidberg leads them into endless woods and it takes a long time to get there.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Eight:

 

Day turns into afternoon, and the noon turned into night as Zoidberg still was leading everyone into Old Man Spacey's cabin. Everyone was feeling lost and hopeless. They all had flashlights.

 

Amy: This is like going around in circles! I'm never going hiking again! And bad enough, Scruffy's missing.

 

Hermes: Sweet Sarafi of The Sahari! Literally.

 

Fry (sobbing): How much more longer are we going to get there? Poor Scruffy! I was just getting used to him!

 

Leela: Don't worry, Fry. This is Zoidberg's fault. He never should've wandered off. As for Scruffy, someone must've snatched!

 

Zoidberg: Well, excuuuuuse me! I almost got blasted away with a Bazooka! Old Man Spacey probably snatched him anyway.

 

Bender (in a Jack Palance voice): Join me my friends as a delivery crew gets lost in the woods putting all faith and hope into a dumbass loser lobster who doesn't know his own ass from a hole on the ground! As we're on the hunt for a mysterious serial killer tonight on Bender's! (whispering) Believe It..........Or Not!

 

Hermes: Will you stop with the scary voices, already! Consider other people's feelings, mon!

 

Amy: We're lost and all you can do is tell jokes? Don't you care about anybody?

 

Fry: Say, look? What's this black powder on the ground here?

 

Zoidberg: Fry! You're a genius! That's from the keg of TNT I tried to blow up Old Man Spacey's House with!

 

Fry: Wow! I'm a genius! (To Bender): You know, I've been smart this whole time, only didn't know!

 

Bender: Next time on Bender's....Believe It Or Not, I punch the nose of an annoyingly immature and scrawny 90 pound delivery boy! (punches Fry)

 

Fry: Ow! Snap! Hey!

 

Bender: Couldn't resist!

 

Zoidberg runs up to the cabin and everyone follows the trial of TNT powder.

 

Leela: Oh, my gosh. Zoidberg was right.

 

Zoidberg: He's right in here. Maybe Scruffy's in here, too.

 

Leela: No, doubt it. Scruffy's dead.

 

Bender (singing): Nights In White Satin! We're Seeking a Corpse!

 

They all run inside the cabin and see a an wooden table, beer bottles, syringes, dirty magazines, and pill bottles, pills, and empty OTC cough medicine bottle laying around.

 

Fry, Leela, Hermes, Amy, and Zoidberg: SCRUFFY! SCRUFFY!

 

Bender: WOO HOO! This Old Man Spacey must've had a wild party last night! This is my kind of place, and he's my kind of guy!

 

Leela: Why am I not surprised?

 

Then they heard Mom scream in anger at them.

 

Mom: GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE NOW!

 

Fry (screams): Think we better do what she says!

 

Leela: Run!

 

Amy: I'm getting out of here! This place is so gross and vile!

 

Hermes: Hate the sound of old ladies yelling! It's like visiting In-Laws With Labarbra!

 

As Everyone ran out, Zoidberg was the last to leave.

 

Zoidberg: Hey, wait for me!

 

They all ran out of the house and they're outside of the cabin and it's very dark outside.

 

Bender: HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! Run away, wussies!! Can't take this cool drug house, huh?

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Nine:

 

In the cabin, Old Man Spacey and Mom were in bed together.

 

Old Man Spacey: I'm glad you got rid of those people who tried to come in. Who were they?

 

Mom: Just some morons who I'm rivals with. It's kinda sexy getting together with someone just as evil as I am!

 

Old Man Spacey: A serial killer like me with a corrupt business woman like you? We make an awesome pair!

 

Mom: Now where were we?

 

As Mom and Old Man Spacey were making out, outside, The Planet Express crew all strategize a plan to go back inside the cabin. Fry comes up to the camera with a flashlight on his face. Tears were coming out of his eyes.

 

Fry (whimpering): I'm so scared! (sob) I'm so scared! If we don't make it out, just want everyone to know that I will always love my friends. Send Leela my love if I die, tell Bender that we had a nice bromance together.....(sob) I'm so scared! I'm so scared! We're all going to get hacked to pieces. If we do, please rememeber us, Professor. I'm so scared! I'm so scared! The best crew you ever had. Please don't forget about us, you can replace us and (sob). This is all Zoidberg's fault. Rest In Peace, Scruffy!

 

Leela: Fry! Come on! We need your help! Don't you want to find out what happened to Scruffy?

 

Fry: I don't want to help. I'm paralyzed with fear!

 

Bender: Too bad! Somebody get me a gun, I wanna shoot this coward! You're coming in with us!

 

Leela: You don't have to fight him, Fry. Bender and I will do all the work.

 

Fry: Okay. I'll stand and watch.

 

Bender: If you, Leela, and the others die, I'll sell all your organs on the Black Market to Brazil in your memory.

 

Fry (sobs): You'd do that for me?

 

Bender: I sure would! Now come on, let's go kick some serial killer ass! (whimpering) No wait....

 

Leela: You accuse Fry of being a cravenly scaredy cat, and now you're acting like one.

 

Bender (bashfully): Y'know.....I'm kind of........torn. Don't know whether to help you guys take him down, or join him? I'm so conflicted!

 

Leela (drags Bender): We don't have time for this nonsense!

 

Hermes: What about us?

 

Leela: You guys wait here, and shoot off a flair gun if we're in any danger.

 

Amy: Good luck you guys!

 

Leela (sarastically): I thought you liked this serial killer!

 

Bender: I do. Just wanted to go along with killing him to be popular! But I'm still between a rock and a hard place about it.......

 

Fry: Oh, Bender! You just know exactly what to say in a time of crisis!

 

Bender throws a beer bottle at the cabin. Old Man Spacey gets out of bed.

 

Mom: Oh, great! It's those rivals of mine from another company! They're back!

 

Old Man Spacey: I'll get rid of whoever that is!

 

Bender, Leela, and Fry all run inside the cabin ready to do battle with Old Man Spacey and to find Scruffy! Bender set down the camera and put in on Automatic.

 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Ten:

 

While Bender, Leela, and Fry were inside Old Man Spacey's cabin, Hermes, Amy, and Zoidberg were waiting outside.

 

Old Man Spacey: Who are you?

 

Bender: This is Mike Wallace, you're under arrest!

 

Leela: We're here to end your reign of terror once and for all!

 

Fry: Yeah, you haunt little kids.

 

Leela: After this, we're taking you to prison!

 

Bender: You know what they do to your kind in the joint?

 

Old Man Spacey: You're going to have to catch me first! (takes out a bazooka)

 

Fry: YIKES! Zoidberg wasn't lying about the bazooka!

 

Bender and Leela take out laser guns from Bender's compartment. Fry runs to the corner and watches.

 

Fry: What should I do?

 

Leela: Go look for Scruffy!

 

Fry (takes the camera): Okay. You guys can fight them, you're both tough and strong, and I'm not. (walks away)

 

Bender: Bring it on, Old Spice! Leela and I will take you down, Mr. and Mrs. Smith style! Still want to join forces with you......

 

As Bender and Leela were shooting at and chasing Old Man Spacey down the corridor, Fry tries to look for Scruffy.

 

Fry: I took the camera because I don't want any violence to be shown. SCRUFFY! SCRUFFY!

 

Old Man Spacey runs into a Rogue's Gallery of serial killers all throughout history. Leela and Bender shoot up the paintings of John Wayne Gacy, Ted Bundy and Jeffrey Dohmer. Old Man Spacey is in hiding.

 

Leela: Where are you, spineless coward! You can't hide from us forever!

 

Bender: Reveal yourself so I can learn of your serial killing ways! And kick your ass! Dammit! What should I decide?

 

Meanwhile Fry was in the basement all panic stricken.

 

Fry: SCRUFFY! (hysterically): SCRUFFY! Where are you?! Please don't be dead.....

 

Back upstairs, Bender and Leela found Old Man Spacey who was hiding in a bathroom.

 

Leela: Surrender!

 

Old Man Spacey: NEVER!

 

Bender (shakes his hand): Old Man Spacey! My name is Bender! I'm a fan of yours. It's been my dream to destroy humanity and.....

 

Old Man Spacey: Shut Up! One more word, I'll kill you all right where you stand!

 

Downstairs, Fry finally found Scruffy. He was facing the wall as if he had been killed.

 

Fry: Scruffy! Scruffy! I found you! Be okay!

 

Old Man Spacey continues to shoot the bazooka at Bender and Leela. Then Leela karate kicks the bazooka away from Old Man Spacey. Bender breaks the bazooka which causes the shrapnel to fly and land on the black TNT powder that Zoidberg used. Fry tries to revive Scruffy.

 

Fry (grabs Scruffy and lands on the floor): Scruffy! Scruffy! (takes off Scruffy's shirt) You haven't had your heart torn out.

 

Scruffy (gets up): Thanks for saving me, Fry. Old Man Spacey used the heart as bait so he can lure us here. He was going to draw my blood....

 

Bender: You see Old Man Spacey, the best way to kill a human is a laser gun, not your primative....

 

Leela (hits Bender): Stop that! We're making a citizen's arrest on you.......

 

Then the fire followed the black TNT powder into the cabin, and Old Man Spacey suddenly shot ten feet up in the air and landed on Zoidberg's feet. Bender and Leela run out of the cabin, as did Fry with Scruffy in tow. Old Man Spacey was knocked out.

 

Fry: We did it! We did it! We saved Scruffy and Bender and Leela blew him up!

 

Bender takes the camera from Fry. Then a hovercar lands and out comes Edgar and Chester.

 

Leela: Oh, no!

 

Bender: Not those two again....

 

Hermes: They tried to mess with me when I sang commercial jingles.

 

Amy: What do you guys want now?

 

Zoidberg: You sang commercial jingles?

 

Fry: When did you guys do that?

 

Leela: You both weren't there when that happened.

 

Edgar: We're not here for you guys...

 

Chester: We're here for the Lobster!

 

Edgar and Chester both walk up to Zoidberg.

 

Zoidberg: What can I do for you fine gentlemen?

 

Chester: We secretly followed you all here to Old Saw Mill.

 

Edgar: We're very impressed with your work on the documentary.

 

Chester: So we decided that we're going to take your documentary to Hollywood!

 

Amy: But we're the ones who did the documentary!

 

Edgar: Yeah, right sure you did.....

 

Zoidberg: Does this mean I'm the hero?

 

Fry: We're the real heroes! I saved Scruffy and Leela and Bender fought off Old Man Spacey!

 

Scruffy: Second that.

 

Chester: How dare you guys try to take credit away from this brave lobster!

 

Bender: Zoidberg gets the credit for this? He made us get lost and.....

 

Edgar: Shut up! (takes camera): Zoidberg, we're flying you to Hollywood and making this documentary about you! What do you say!

 

Zoidberg: Hooray! Zoidberg's finally done something that's going to make him famous!

 

Bender: That's it! Zoidberg is going to get Powed! Right in the kisser!

 

Leela: You know what, let him have his moment.

 

Fry: Let's not speak out.

 

Hermes: This is a total insult to our character.

 

Amy: What about Old Man Spacey?

 

Chester: We're taking him with us as proof that Zoidberg captured him.

 

Mom: I'll get my revenge on you, Planet Express for stealing my boyfriend away! (shakes fist)

 

Back in Planet Express. They were waiting for Edgar and Chester to come back with the documentary. Old Man Spacey was now in prison.

 

Farnsworth: So, Zoidberg took the credit for taking down Old Man Spacey?

 

Hermes: Unfortunately yes. If anything he messed up the whole mission.

 

Amy: Oh great. Here comes Edgar and Chester with the documentary.

 

As Fry, Bender, Leela, Hermes, and Amy were waiting for Zoidberg to come back with Edgar and Chester. They all entered the room.

 

Chester: Here is it as promised! For some reason my head is aching.

 

Edgar: Yeah me, too. Anyway, we call it, The Zoidberg Project!

 

Leela: WHAT? It was called The Old Saw Mill Project!

 

Zoidberg: Isn't this great! Nothing can ruin my big moment, now!

 

Chester (puts in DVD): Lights, camera.....

 

Hermes: Boy, that sounds familiar.

 

Bender: This is going to suck big time!

 

The DVD shows the title and it's called Bender's.....Believe It Or Not! It onlyshows the end of the film. It also shows Bender on the film instead of Zoidberg. Then it shows Bender take down Old Man Spacey in the same fashion as him and Leela did, and Old Man Spacey this time lands on Bender's feet.

 

Hermes: What the hell? This isn't the whole documentary!

 

Fry: Has this been edited?

 

Leela: Bender! You did this, didn't you!

 

Bender: I most certainly did! I snuck over to Hollywood, and I erased everything else that was filmed. I only left in the ending. Then I digitially remastered myself over Zoidberg! Thank you digitial techology!

 

Zoidberg: You ruined my big moment! I'll never get my time in the spotlight! (runs away and cries)

 

Fry: Wow, Bender! How did you do this?

 

Bender: I just explained it to you, scrawny idiot! (hits Fry)

 

Edgar: You knocked us out, didn't you?

 

Chester: So you can steal the credit away from that poor repressed lobster!

 

Everyone turns their eyes on Bender.

 

Bender: You'd think that, wouldn't you?

 

THE END

 

Closing Credits

 


End file.
